Return To Zero

OC Walk to Remember Chair of the Board Elizabeth Pagliarini, Cofounder Kristyn von Rotz, Board Member Allison DeGeorge, Minnie Driver, Executive Director Ryan Farnsworth

I had the honor of watching the film Return to Zero. And on Saturday, May 17, the film will premiere on Lifetime at 8 pm PST for all of you to see.

This film is based on the true story of writer and director Sean Hanish and his wife Kiley’s loss of their son. It’s about stillbirth. It’s about death. It’s about being broken.
But that’s not what the movie IS. Return to Zero beautifully tells the story of marriage and relationships. It shows the complexity of how men and women deal with life. It’s funny, hopeful, inspiring.
I had the honor of meeting Paul Adelstein and Minnie Driver at the premiere of the film. They were so warm, embracing those of us who had lost baby. This film means something to them. And those of us who have had a baby die, we mean something to them. Minnie plays the mother who gives birth to her stillborn son, and Paul the father. Through this film, they are giving a voice to those of us who have lost a baby in pregnancy or infancy.
When I saw the film, it was emotional, and I cried big, sloppy tears. But the one thing that I couldn’t stop thinking about was that this film validated me. It validated my loss. Finally everyone can peek into my world–the world of a mother who is continually grieving the death of her baby.

Cofounder Kristyn von Rotz and her husband, Advisory Committee member Mark von Rotz, at the premiere of Return to Zero in Los Angeles.

When my son Joseph died nine years ago, we chose not to let anyone see him. We had a small, private burial service. I wanted to protect our family and friends from the horrific grief I was feeling. But in doing so, I also didn’t give them the opportunity to really see my reality. This film will give family and friends of those of us who have had a baby die a raw look into our emotions, thoughts, and, well, our life.

But this film isn’t just for those of us who have had a baby die. It’s for anyone who has experienced loss, grief, or death in their life. It’s a beautiful story. It’s a beautiful film.

I’m forever grateful to Sean and Kiley Hanish for sharing their son Norbert with us. This film is going to change things. Just watch and see.

Kristyn von Rotz, Cofounder, OC Walk to Remember

Mom to Joseph Thomas von Rotz 7-8-2004

In memory of Joseph Thomas von Rotz. Because Mark and Kristyn donated to Return To Zero’s Kickstarter campaign, their son’s name appears at the end of the movie.


Share Your Personal Blog Here!

We are updating the “Personal Blog” list and would love it if you would share yours with us. If you have an online journal, blog, or website that you use as an outlet to express your grief, tell us about it!

Please email me- and your link will be added under the category link “Personal Blogs”, which is found on the right side of this page.

Thank you!!

Please share this “button” on your blog too!

Here is the HTML to add the button:

<center><a href=””><img border=”0″ src=””/></a></center>


“We are grieving, We are not contagious, We are not sad all the time, We laugh, We smile, We cry, We weep for being happy, We live, We talk, We feel, We come from every background, We are sad, we lost a baby, We are…” -Jennifer Davis

World Television Premiere – Return To Zero- Saturday, May 17th Only on Lifetime!

Let the countdown begin…
We encourage you to share the image above on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter or your own personal blog! Are you ready for more exciting news? Director Sean Hanish and his wife, Kiley’s Return To Zero interview with Brooke Anderson of Entertainment Tonight is scheduled to air Wednesday, May 7th! Check your local listings for time and channel in your area.


What’s it about?

Based on a true story, Return to Zero, tells the story of a successful couple, Maggie and Aaron, who are preparing for the arrival of their first child. Just weeks before their due date they are devastated to discover that their baby son has died in the womb and will be stillborn.

The two attempt to go on with their lives but cannot escape their postpartum grief and their relationship has been forever altered by this loss. They try to cope in a myriad of ways– through denial, escape, and alcohol– but when Maggie discovers that Aaron is having an affair with a co-worker, she decides to end the marriage. Just when Maggie believes she has started a new life, she discovers that she is pregnant. With the help of an empathetic doctor who once experienced a similar loss, Maggie finally learns to grieve for her son and must reunite with Aaron to prepare for their second pregnancy.

Below are some pictures taken from tonight’s red carpet event for the Return To Zero movie premier in Los Angeles.

OC Walk to Remember Board of Directors, Chair of the Board Elizabeth Pagliarini, Cofounder Kristyn von Rotz, Board Member Allison DeGeorge, Executive Director Ryan Farnsworth, STILL Project’s Carrie and Jonathan Pasquel, and CarlyMarie.


Paul Adelstein

                Alfred Molina
                                                 Minnie Driver

Fundraising Event for OC Walk to Remember This Weekend!

Come See us at Bob’s Old Fashioned Ice Cream at the Orange County Market Place! We’ll be there selling hand-dipped ice cream bars for $3 each. The great news is that OC Walk to Remember keeps the entire purchase price! Please share with your friends!

DATES: Saturday, April 12th and Sunday, April 13th
TIMES: 10:00 am – 4:00 pm                                                                                     WHERE: Bob’s Old Fashioned Ice Cream on the East side of the Swap Meet, Row E, Aisle 3. Look for Elvis on the building.

Can’t wait to see everyone!

Volunteer Isabel Royal Makes a Big Difference in the Community

October 5, 2013-Isabel’s 2nd year volunteering at the OC Walk to Remember event

Isabel Royal, 12 years old from San Clemente takes action and brings positive change in her community. Not only does she enjoy cooking, surfing,tubing and swimming, volunteering is what she likes to do. For the past 2 years, Isabel has been a volunteer at OC Walk to Remember’s yearly event in October.

On September 10, 2012 her friends Jennifer and Jeffrey Watanabe lost their baby, Luke due to a cord accident. To support them, Isabel and her family attended their 1st OC Walk to Remember event and walked to honor Luke. Isabel was eager to help and handed out water bottles. The second year, she became more involved and participated at the temporary tattoo booth. “It’s a fun and worthy cause. My family and I try to help them out as much as possible. I wanted to see how I could help out, so my idea was to go on the website. I saw that you could volunteer, so I did.”

Team name: Luke’s Skywalkers

At the temporary tattoo booth, there were suggested donations of $1, but some people donated more, it was a fun activity for kids and their families. Isabel also had a great time meeting new people and hearing their stories. “I liked when they handed out the white roses because it showed a lot of support for families, and I enjoyed seeing them smile.”

Volunteering has impacted Isabel’s life in such a positive way. In order to have a Bat Mitzvah, one of the requirements is to complete a final project. She put together a board about this organization, displayed it for others to see, and spoke about her experience at OC Walk to Remember. “I just like helping people, I raised $35 for OC Walk to Remember. I can give back to the community and show that I can help out in some way. Even though I am young, I can do more than what I thought I could do before. You don’t want to forget about their child; make more memories.”

She’s such an inspiration. Today, Isabel celebrates her Bat Mitzvah! Congratulations!! Thank you so much Isabel for making a big difference in the community!

Isabel’s Family: Parents Ken, Dawn, and brother Alex